A FEW WORDS ON LOVE
Life just keeps on unfolding and we can either hop on the boat and float on the current or resist and swim against it. I travelled back and forth for a long time but then on April 2nd of 2020 my shift in reality became so profound and the current became so stormy, that I had no choice but to drop down into the bottom of my boat and allow it to take me wherever I needed to go.
It is interesting how life does what it does. How in the flash of a moment things are seen that can never be unseen. Life till that moment was like walking around with a flashlight in a dark room only seeing that which the light hits. All I knew was life through that perspective and I cherish every moment of my life till then. On that day in April something opened up for me. The flashlight became brighter and for a moment the room was completely lit. It’s interesting because in the end it’s the same life. Nothing circumstantially had changed but through the shift in my perception nothing would ever be the same.
One perspective is not better than the other, I want to make that very clear. Your life doesn’t have any more or less value in accordance to your perception of it. However the wider your perspective the easier it becomes to navigate life. It is simply less overwhelming that way. In states of alignment life can become this beautiful improvisation through which you can express the totality of being you.
I believe that this shift I experienced holds a very important message for all of us. A message that has been told before and will be told again. What I’m about to say might go against many self help teachings and methods but that doesn’t make it any less true for me. What it means for you I’ll leave up to you. Life is how you see it and I merely want to share what it is that I see. Are you ready? Here it is: You are loved exactly as you are. You are not supposed to be any different then you are. The love that lies inside of all creation is inside you regardless of how you show up, where you show up from and how you perceive yourself.
At first I felt like I couldn’t write this paper or come out saying any of this because I couldn’t maintain a constant alignment with this truth. But then I quickly realized that my level of alignment is not related to the message being any more or less true then it is. I actually find myself writing this after some of my least glorious moments feeling lost and confused. You know that even in this state of confusion this loving presence still surrounds me and is cheering me on to put these words out into the world! This truth is ever present and there is nothing I actively have to do about it. It’s there in moments when I’m aligned with it and it’s there when I’m not. I see this loving energy always, whatever I’m going through, eyes open or eyes closed. It’s like a rain of grace that constantly surrounds me. It’s a true blessing to be able to see this.
All of this has shown me in a profound way that, regardless of what we may have been told or believe to be true, there is no judgement from creation or the creator towards us. There is only love. This also means that we can’t fail at life. Leaning into this truth allows life to become a whole lot more easy and even magical at times. Because think about it, if we can’t fail at life we can skip all the steps that we take in order to cover our bases and we can instead just live.
We as people need a lot of convincing that we are any good. We think we have to deserve love. Me included. I deemed certain aspects of myself to be unlovable and wanted to hide them from the world and even from myself. I have spent months consciously being surrounded by this energy of grace and love and you know how much my ego tried to prove to me that I’m not worthy of it? It tries because it knows that the moment I accept this love, the game is over. That the carefully constructed ego has no control over someone that loves himself fully including this construct itself. The light of love brings to the surface and then dissolves or integrates anything that is not in alignment with it. At some point it was time to give in and receive the love I was being offered, saying yes to being worthy of this unconditional form of ‘God’ love. It has shown me that I can love all of me, the shadow as much as the light. That it’s all a part of my brilliance.
What I have realized is that we don’t have to outshine being human. We have to accept that we are and align with our humanity. Align with ourselves. Be brave enough to stop being normal and start being natural. All of nature is in alignment, everything in creation optimally thrives in states of harmony but we as human beings have lost this inner alignment and therefore we have lost our conscious connection to creation. As a result of this we feel separate, alone and lost.
This disconnect has been in place for generations on end. We simply haven’t been modeled what it means to feel an inner completion and we have forgotten that we are whole, that we are alive and that this aliveness of being makes us worthy. We have dismissed parts of ourselves and this has led to an inner separation. The world around us is reflecting this separation back to us but few people have been courageous enough to own up to this truth. Now it’s time to collect the bits of ourselves
that we left behind over time. Stop the inner fragmentation and love all aspects ourselves.
The separation that we experience starts from feeling unsafe in life. We try to control and steer our experience towards a certain outcome thinking that this brings us more safety, assuming that our limited perspective is better than the big unfolding of life. Life is always moving us towards more, regardless of how we perceive it. It’s evolution, a constant expansion. The idea of safety that I mentioned before is an illusion, there are no guarantees and any moment could potentially be our last on this earth. Life is a continuous falling, the question is can we relax into this truth and surrender? Maybe we should accept that life is beyond our comprehension and just trust in each moment as it presents itself to us. Trust that our experience of it is as it should be. I don’t understand life, but when I stop trying to get it and allow myself to just be in the experience of it, my heart opens and even the hardest moments have a level of grace to them.
I’m excited because our generation and generations after us will have the choice to consciously acknowledge this energy of creation. To be honest, align with what's happening at every moment on every level and run towards the unresolved parts inside of us instead of running away. We can stop patching up, adding another layer of foundation, carefully editing our appearance towards the world and go back to authenticity, honesty and vulnerability. It takes courage, lots of it and if anything I would like this paper to be the hand you can reach out to. The voice that tells you it’s OK, that you are loved no matter what. That you don’t need to sensor and edit yourself. That you can be raw and real.
What happens when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable is quite miraculous. We realize that there is a deep peace lying underneath all that we experience. It’s under every wave of emotion, under the experience of pain, under every thought and under anything that we are going through in our lives. A natural result from aligning with our experience and letting it be OK is that we don't have to act it out anymore. The moment you can see that it's always been between you and yourself this peace starts to reveal itself. Peace is our natural state of being, it’s the very place where we can access the connection to creation I’m talking about. It’s home. Till we fully remember this truth we will always partially remain separate and in survival.
I want to close off by saying the following; I am the same as you are. There is nothing special about me. However we are all unique expressions of one light. Our very essence is shared with all human beings and everything in creation. This means that if I can remember this connection everyone can.
Be courageous, willing, authentic and loving to all that you are. Fill your heart with gratitude every morning, for you get to live another day. Meet everything with a childlike sense of curiosity for we are living amongst miracles if only we dare to see. In the end, when we see that we ARE the miracle we can finally be free.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. You are loved.